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Soyjak.blog/Copypastas
This page is a work in progress. You WILL NOT edit parts of this page until they are properly finished.
This page is a compilation of some copypastas and infamous quotes that have turned into inside jokes with the community.
Copypastas
Virginity loss story
Anyone up for a virginity loss story thread?
>be me
>autistic girl
>never had an irl friend
>this time I started college
>talk to guy on the college's discord server
>he asks me why I dmed him
>"oh to be fwbs haha"
>"so you wanna fuck?"
>"sure"
>ffwd today
>he says he's on my campus
>find him
>"nice to meat you!"
>"wanna go in the bathroom?"
>"sure"
>tell him to unzip
>wowthatsadick.jpeg
>start off with an awkward handjob
>he's on his phone texting me
>he didn't want to be loud
>"can you suck it?"
>"uhh maybe later"
>my hands start getting tired
>fuck it
>give him the succ
>dick tastes weird at first
>gag a bit
>he seems to enjoy it
>continue
>he facefucks me gently
>starting to enjoy it more
>he texts me he's about to cum
>he fills my mouth with cum
>tastes... interesting
>swallow
>realize i lost my virginity
>feels awesome
>wash my mouse and hands
>i go outside the bathroom first
>go back to class smiling
>feel warm and happy inside
I love sucking dick! I'm gonna be such a cumslut!
Doesn't even close
What have I done...
I feel so gross and ashamed of myself rn
It doesn't fully close anymore...
Jobber of the schlog
>I, Vivo Endive, JOBBER of the Schlog, humbly kneel to:
>Terrycrews-sama, top poster and my master
>Molly-sama, my only true love and my other master
>SmallAnus-sama, who I will never become stronger than
>Imperator-sama, who my janny warned me about
>Fortuna-sama, who easily manhandled me in his Superspeed-typing form
>Tojo-sama, whose posts anally raped me and first awakened my latent homosexuality
>Steve-sama, who beat the shit out of me so hard I started becoming as attracted to BBC as I am to BWC.
>DonaldMcDonald-sama, whose incomparibly forceful jartybombs crushed my asswomb to the point I cannot bear Terry's children anymore like I wished to.
>Goldy-sama, whose hours-long jartybombing caused me uncontrollable rage even the anal rape from Teresa can't be compared to.
>DOLL-sama, for he has my IP AS WELL AS the IP of my spamming masters.
>Joel-sama, whose powers I am scared of.
What does the burger say?
Hot dog barks, nugget bites,
Pizza slices through the night,
Taco spins, burrito twirls,
French fries dance with salty swirls.
Chick-fil-A makes a moo sound,
Coca-Cola bubbling 'round,
Doughnut spins in circles tight,
Ketchup squirts with all its might.
But there's one thing we all ask...
What does the burger say?
Nom-nom-nom-nom-nommy-nom!
Chew-chew-chew-chew-chompy-chomp!
Munch-munch-munch-munch-tasty-crunch!
What does the burger say?
Slurp-slurp-slurp-slurp-soda-sip!
Dip-dip-dip-dip-chip-to-dip!
Chomp-chomp-chomp, burrito drop!
What does the burger say?
Grease on fries, buns in stacks,
Secret sauce on Big Mac snacks,
Onion rings that start to hum,
Everyone gets indigestion!
The fast food knows it all,
But no one can recall...
What does the burger say?
Nom-nom-nom-nom-nommy-nom!
Quotes
Plapping
| > | no i'm too busy plapping Teresa | < |
| -Jimbo | ||
I cried
| > | I cried when they shut down aguguland. | < |
| -Steve | ||
Age of mind
| > | yah, but it's also about age of mind | < |
| -Princessparkles | ||
Finger
| > | I stuck a finger up my anus, AMA I didn't feel any pleasure. How tf do faggots even like this? |
< |
| -encrusting_acro | ||
